Apr. 5th, 2011

overocea: (Default)
I am so afraid of doing so wrong that I falter and start, mumble and fart
about, do nothing and nothing more, until I have no choice anymore,
and am saved! no more decisions for me, hurray.
I'll live to while away
a few more hapless, harried days.

so much life spent being
sad and uncertain and sorry and scared. how silly, how silly, how silly.
but, well, as long as everyone hurts but me
(sighing, staring longingly
while I spit my prettie words like coins,
hugely blinking shining, guileless eyeshadows
at all the girls &boys),
yes, maybe. maybe, perhaps, we'll see..
as long as, till then, you keep feeding me.
I need, I need, I need.

eh, dishonesty.
look, here I go,
I snarl and tear my only flesh,
already purple and red and grey,
eaten away.
eating for the rotten part
but there's so much in the way.

I start to think there never was
any quite so rotten
as that I've chewed to bleeding death.
but, well...
even my own miserable flaws are more enthralling by far than anyone elses's enchantingly shining traits
any day. :)

"Whenever she felt lost in the endless deserts of insomnia she would take up the labyrinthian thread of her life again from the beginning to see if she could find at what moment the paths had become confused."

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